I've Got To Do This Myself, Alone
2005-02-08 @ 11:27 p.m.
So, I'm a big girl now. :-P No, really.
I made an appointment with Family Services all by myself! Heh. Actually, they kind of cornered me. Carmel(my current therapist) called me and asked me if I wanted to continue going and I said yes, because I really do think I need to keep going just so I have someone to talk to. I don't think that she'll hurt me any. So, they switched all of my files(oh, believe me, there are many) from the high school back to that little building. Tomorrow at 5:30, I will officially have to go back into the building that holds so many hours of tears and family hell. I cringe whenever I even pass by it. Oh well.
'You've made life completely miserable
You've drove me to the edge you've caused me all this pain
But I always loved you cause you're oh so special, oh so special
Broken and I'm alone and I can not maintain...'
'I've got to do this myself,
Alone
Alone
Alone....'
So, I finally contacted Sam and we talked about music snobbery for like, an hour. That was nice. I kind of thought Angela would call but she probably fell asleep or something.
I really want the car we're borrowing from my mom's friend right now. It's so easy to drive, and tiny! I doubt it'll happen though. I'm perpetually screwed in the licensed driver department.
Sometimes I feel so utterly Italian. My brother makes me feel like we're involved in some grand gang scheme or something. Sometimes I'm wary around his friends because I wonder if when I'm older he'll want me to be with one of them just so he knows what I'm doing at all times.
This life get's old, and fast.
Anyway, I had a ton of stuff to say, and I've completely forgotten it all.
'So hold on to your dreams,
Cause your nightmares might seem like your reality...'
Jacoby of Papa Roach's voice is so unique and gruff and explosive and utterly beautiful. I saw that man in person, I shook his hand, I spoke to him, I saw him shake on stage, and express emotions I often feel captured in.
He's such a talented and kind man.
Today is(for ninteen more minutes!) Carnival!
-SaM
Last 5
Cool Kids, They Belong Together - 2005-03-16
Sleep Soundless - 2005-03-14
The Best Thing I Need - 2005-03-14
To All Of Ye Good Men - 2005-03-13
The Black Label Society are Blasting My Ears So Good - 2005-03-11